Pregnancy has 4 trimesters, not 3

This post would be one of my most direct and upfront about my personal views on effective parenting.

Many a times, we hear existant parents mention the following:

1) Do not shake the baby or it'll get used to it and wanna be shaked often.
2) Do not carry him too much or he wants to be carried a lot in future
3) Do not always give the baby what he wants or he'll be spoilt and we'll have trouble controlling him in future.

Personally, these views are views of Scarcity i feel. Not an opinion of inspiration or opinion of love, and nourishment. They are views that're fear based.

After reading so many books, i concur that:

There is a 4th trimester in pregnancies, instead of three. Interestingly enough, most "problems" happen in the first 3 months of babyhood, where parents are getting used to the presence of their newborn, and the newborn gettin' used to their new environment. (illness and viruses aside)
The 4 trimester to me is a period of learning, understanding and discovery.

Babies are used to their environment in their mom's womb, curled up tight, swishing and swoshing around in fluid, hearing rhythms of blood flow and sounds through amniotic fluid and walls of womb, most clearly, is the mom's heartbeat.

I'm learning the few techniques of guaranteed soothing of baby's cries:

For
1) Do not shake the baby or it'll get used to it and wanna be shaked often:

Baby's have been in mothers womb for 6-9 months and have been swishing around in the womb due to mom's movement in moving and walking etc. That's their world!
The best way to sooth a baby is to bring him back to the supposed environment of their initial home as much as possible...
Carrying the baby and shaking him / rocking gently often quietens him after a while ;)

2) Do not carry him too much or he wants to be carried a lot in future:

A foetus's world in this mom's womb has little space to manuever around, tight constrains etc. Not sayin' that we should carry him TIGHTLY and SQUEEZE him .... but simply by either wrapping him up in a towel fully, or carrying him close to our body (esp skin to skin contact) evokes his memories of his time in the womb, thus bringing him familiarity. ;0

3) Do not always give the baby what he wants or he'll be spoilt and we'll have trouble controlling him in future:

I had trouble believing this one really... haha ;)
I now believe that: the baby needs reassurances in this strange new world of his in bright lights and sounds and "things" ... when a baby cries, it signifies it's discomfort in something ... either hungry, sleepy, overstimulated, wants to be carried, soiled diapers, or simply cranky.

When we approach him when he cries to give him attention, over time, he gains this level of trust in his parents that they will be there for him whenever he needs something.

A baby's cries illicits a stimulus reaction in his parents, almost instinctive i feel, to cater for his needs. And providing for his kid is fantastically parently.
Over time, a baby gains confidence in his environment that he's supported, and dares to venture out on his own, all the time knowing that there's a emotional "safety net".

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In a nutshell, i'm not claiming to be an expert in baby care. i'm still learning. I'm simply stating the things that i CHOOSE to believe in. Amazingly, after my choices, my heart feels peace and refreshed, instead of pressed and fearful.

All kids will turn out to be ok somehow ... ;)

God bless kids. They're lovely and gifts of immense learning.